Look out world, I'm on my way!

And so, kicking and screaming, I join the wonderful world of bloggers. I think it's high time I let the world know what goes on in this crazy head of mine. And it begins, as any blog of mine should, with emotion.

I don't know about you, but I experience everything intensely. Phrases like "kind of" or "a little bit" have no place in the description of my feelings. So when I'm in the trenches of a difficult season, I frequently spend most of my days either fighting against or drowning in a mind-numbing, heart-throbbing, joy-searing pain. 

In the darkness of those days, all I want to do is get to the other side of the pain. I'd give anything to stop the hurt, to quiet my mind, to experience happiness again. But to realize every moment of life means to live it to the fullest even in, maybe especially in, the moments that hurt us the most. 

Pain is not pointless. It contains the possibility of beauty and growth and the chance to know God in a way we never had to before. We see the place of heartache as the valley of the shadow of death but the Lord sees it as a doorway to life. C.S. Lewis put it brilliantly when he said,“Pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world." 

When do we run to God out of sheer desperation? When do we cry out to him more loudly than ever before? When do we realize how utterly dependent we are on him and that we truly can do nothing apart from Him? When we are in pain. Happiness is beautiful and laughter is one of the best gifts from God. But the valley, too, holds a quiet beauty. Tears cleanse the heart and soul.

"The word 'patience' implies the willingness to stay where we are and live the situation to the full in the belief that something hidden there will manifest itself to us. Patient living means to live actively in the present and wait there. Impatient people expect the real thing to happen somewhere else, and therefore they want to get away from the present situation and go elsewhere. For them, the moment is empty. But patient people dare to stay where they are, waiting." - Henri Nouwen

 Oh, that the Lord would give us eyes to see what he is doing when our hearts are aching and patience to weather the storm!